Three Words

"Three words" composed

This thread was started on Jan 04, 2007 at 7:09:42PM. This insane story was written using three words at a time. I've tried to keep things as un-edited as possible but there were a few cases which required at edit. Enjoy.

Pages 1-55 - By Wheresoever

Once upon a time there lived a yeti crab who lived inside a giant whale's decaying innards decided it was time for the power of dance within his crusty soul, where hidden yearnings had for years languished unrealized, to break free. So he waved his little yeti crab and called out, "Oh, I am so lonely... please, if you have hidden desires to dance the night away like you just do not have a care for this game because it can be nice without a wee wee, then bless me cuz I am more than a bitch ass sucka. You mutha f**ka how come you don't do this?" "Do WHAT?!" asked the large walrus as he bathed in a tub because of the global warming problem. So the man decided to play touch my little rubber ducky, causing massive head trauma ...

{Um, is there any chance we might be able to do this without having it instantly devolve into various mindless vulgarity and such?}

... which led to other people looking on in revulsion. One had a tendency to go and report to the police and they came to the idiot convention to find you reading from a porn magazine of three little white sheep in the mouth of a Inlet of Myroria. That led to YOU, ME, BADASSES! That were whooped because we tried to send nukes at them for no particular reason. So they had to retreat into the big famous house of mystery so they would give me three hours-long spanking. It was quite a painful experience, but I loved the free candy which i loved to gnaw my very very special teeth with but I do not and will never think about the fricking handbags that you can never have too many of as they say at the local post office that was recently shut down because some went postal! and stamped their smelly dirty feet that just stank! of really old smelly dirty feet

well "smelly dirty feet" can smell like a dead body for example... or cheese

that's fourteen words

=P

thats one word

yeah okay stop

I shall not ever pwn Bustos only once, for he pwns me. Frances the mute could not say how painful the needles under his skin would feel if he was standing at the edge of the cliff by the municipal golf course where the comrade peeed on the Nationalist's equipment, then got very drunk and screwed up bye kissing the ass of Bustos which killed him by infecting him with ecoli virus from eating feces which he loved with extra corn and extra peanuts from transexual prostitutes which like to make loud noises while they do unnamed things and play with balloons which they think will grant immortality from the great pee pee place where Bush was going to bed to dream of naked men and peeing all over his belly and his litile bottle of pespsi MAX which tasted very strange because it had pee in the list of corrosive active ingredients, just below sugar another corrosive ingedient thatlisted the most corrosive chemical that corroded the corrosively corroded chemical. Then PUR drank pure vodka and corrosively corroded chemicals. Then Bustos drank Bustian rum after a hard night ofpartying with Britney Spears and Varkour when we painted the town red and bought some cheap weed which we smoked. Then we got so fraeking high that he could fly fly away to the land of magic beans where the pixies flew and danced all night long because they liked Mushrooms and ale that made me turn green and vomit christmas trees as well as phallic shaped lightbulbs which were rather disturbing to watch especially as they had faces painted to look like former US presidents which then caused massive rectal bleeding which was a very embarrasing situation because their pants were soaked through. Then Bustos threw a knife at the window because he was forced to take his big freaking gun out from his big mouth and sohve it up Dervkar's nose and then shove it up Bustos butt ... {OMG he mite see that post! OH NO!!!!} ... but threw it into the boiling ... {Did i say something worng?} ... of stew i i made yesterday which smelled really bad because I put a rat in my stew although it tastes like a roadside after a truck dumps poop on my late aunt which would smell deliciously like a my butt on a hot tar on the hottest piece of steak in Scotlands history licked by Wallace under the covers and came out into the open fields between PUR and Dervkar which led to the the happy land down south of the big border of your sister's OI! What you want is not all the luxries in the world. So have some of this weed and get high so i missed the whole piont of Dervkar's argument. What freaking argument? The argument you... what freaking argument? The arguement started when bustos said about that thing that you do! The other day I PWNT all. Then Amy gave me some of her big allownce with which I spent it all on PUR's Weed which she smoked most of then-gave-to-Rozarria who was at the street down the block from the cheese factory which is owned by me and Dervkar so it blew up in a cloud of plastic disposable frogs and orange turtles made out of-chicken-feets which then turned out to taste like somewhat gross with an aftertaste that was like sweetcorn marinated in beetle juice and the entrails of a dead mouse who's name was Bert and who was on benefits because of the injury he suffered while jumping from his helicopter during a freak storm while he was trying to eat an orange turtle which was covered in rancid ketchup (congrats on the PWNING) and hot sauce (Thanks =]) stolen from the bank which was located in the Allied States near the old warehouse where all the stray dogs go when they must put on suits to go to nightclubs that involved gay hippy dancing which bustos does not like to do on weekends, although he does occassionally dance on weekdays, as long he have pink tutu and a very pretty hat that often falls on the fire which burns when the hat decides to swing around and fall down over sassy's ass which broke.

Amy, that was

one word short

yes that was

I screamed as Sassy ran near the far old tree which was leaning over in agony when the winds came by. The turtle climbed he thought that flamboyant socialist flag got burned in a most wretched way of Sarumon was very strange because the tree-was-gay and somewhat orange -ish and sexy in-a-way as well as an orange on-sexy-pills which ran away with the spoon that was needed to have sex with a giant with big feet and a little toe the size of a pin. With 3 pins that had been pressed against the wall of amy's-head which hurt Amy in her sara belum which was not in her head it was in-a-jar of pickles on on top of-Amy's-Head which was carefully being balanced by-Amy on a thin pick made of-candycanes-sugercookies-and-all-the candy-in-the-world. This was rather interesting to Amy as she was lying in a-coffin while singing to Rozzaria, Simple, and-TGR while doing the samba in the middle of the night with a rather large and peculiar oppossum lady, that seduced POD and made him forget about Korinna. So when they got back the dog had just pooped violet fluids thet were not particularily flower-perfumed but it was scented with the Old....dry....mucussy.... of her little doggys of Prettienessereser. Read the title. and then post it on Taijitu to great acclaim among the masses of poor ignorant children of Korn who dance like rejects from the planet Mars. I could never dance like A NOOB! The martian was green with a big hat and a Cat made fur coat in his ass. He had to get his brother deported from the local mafia run sweatshop making bootleg coke. Of all the things to do like skinning a Mouse with a tumour. Then I stepped off the bridge and fell off the edge into the glass of orange juice which was carefully placed next to the illuminating fire that ruled the small yet prosperous Hanzac which had much mucus under both of his big tank guns manned by communist minions that belonged to the Evil rabbit overlord who killed all the beasts of burden with the great pencil of doom. He had received from a martian who was somewhat in love with Stephen Hawking and gave him a hard spank on his computer monitor but he was tired from all that hard work his secreatry did while he was playing basketball for "help me Ryanzia" which is a small planet, east of the river that eats people with really huge that look penises and smell like stinky, ugly, sport-teachers who enjoy long walks on the beach with the dogs that are badly deformed because into a Rozarrian guy that smells like bad cheese managed to swallow a very large innuendo for a couple of guys who were not making any sense because they had only 3 words to finish this very silly tale. Which makes no Pies.

Once Apon a chickens back time there was a land devoid of coke bottles so instead they drank sparkling water until one day there were no VIA soldiers left for old harry to shoot with his big "thing" which made love in the form of truffle shuffling. "Whats truffle shuffling?", proclaimed veramark empire! The best nation was undoubtedly tuckeranis! And then he lived.

Once upon story book time love was made in a sexy chicken land party!!! Where all the people were wearing tucks skin while he was purchasing a new coat but then he forgot his name again...

Once upon a dark time there was no drug happy bunnys who liked to do drugs while play the drums loud in bens non existent house where they humped giant wombat hookers who wore clothing, but only sometimes because they felt warm cold water cross their palms in a sexy yet strange fashion. Who hated the democratic state of north korea.

Once upon north korean time a weird man who loved his small expensive dog, which liked to chase after balls which ladies felt (curse you...) and were also extremely large and Fuzzy too. So the ladies licked the dog who like to hump de bump doobody who was gay...

how its a song, damn 4 words...

how? ts song

... ben i dont understand you sometimes especially when I eat some of Doctor Phil's miracle cure which sucks your stress away. In the night and in the bedroom and kitchen where you may have sex regularly with the giant-sized blow up doll man-thing that looks just like Cher with no makeup and a mole which is hairy in all of the ways. God who does not approve of that of stupid penguins and irascible haters of Monte Ozarka are cool penguins that became stupid stories like this. That killed ^ in Veramark's fantasies which had Fallen Earth in them and Parie chickens! The heat was so unbearable it had driven all the people too vermarks insantiy level which is close to Cthulhu's mentalstate which eats the stupid pandas of Shanghai's dilapidated zoo where all the panda haters shoot up on heroin they got from a giant-sized man-thing who likes to play with kittens covered in honey made from the kittens faeces. It made me boba for apples, because they are cool in a werid sort of high creppery way becasue they drink soda and get hyper and start to jump around ridiculously. Sisyphus was the sissy of Fuss and he always thinks about things unrelated to his ungodly large appendage made out of cheese (That's four.) cupcakes baked with Solnath's disgustingly large muffin baking pan. Herakles was a professional bear-wrestler from Ancient Greece and was the son of Zeus and was played by Rowan Atkinson because Arnold Schwarzenegger couldn't be arsed to wrestle a bear because he is the Governor of Minnesota and he holds Alana's heart in his hands like a delicate (Y'know, she will hate us for this. =D) piece of china (Naw, she'll like it) from the Ming (Well, she better.) Dynasty which cost (Chill, she will) about a quarter (She will chill?) of a million (I'm not Yoda.....) pennies which were later distributed to cheap mexican labor to buy green (I have a love-hate relationship with this thread, now. Mostly love.) t-shirts for allama who would wear Solnath's death wish as her underwear with frilly lace and a large composite sphere that covers her head. I love to sing showtunes and dance around the blazing wicker man who like to make stupid typos (Not referring to anything here... =P) and style hair to make it the festival of the Blessed Rains. (Please note the period.) I smell of melted rose cheese that is quite old to the fools at the Republican National Convention eat the new ... {Not to be a mean old grammar nazi, but I don't understand this in the context of the rest of the sentence. Are you starting a new one?}... who eat the (that better) rotten fish sticks (Yes, sorry, I get it now.) made of the rare gooober fish found in the Senior citizen's closet. (Is anyone up to the task of compiling what we have into a more read-friendly version? Surely there must be at least one obsessive compulsive out there...) Maybe there is though it would be a lot let someone else (well done Soly....good job....I might do some later on today if I have a spare minute) set fire to the back of a shaved marmoset who runs like a cocaine fuelled hobo at the fried fish factory. Never before had sex with a (sorry, I couldn't help myself. =D God knows where this'll go now...) long slow gentle flogging of the sheep, led to burns and deep cuts in places that would require one to have a few extra places in places such as your broom closet or the infamous junkyard where the original Brady Bunch gather to plot their comeback this summer. A comeback that will rock your pants off like Elvis did back when he was doing the Jailhouse warden's back massage. Actually, we could have sold the spare parts from Chuck Norris' funeral to the cafeteria. But then the angry, rabid mob might attack with pitchforks and burning torches. Of course, they won't because we have David Bowie with us. (Thanks for the set-up, hun!) He can easily control our minds with his hypnotic "Labyrinth" glass balls. But derren brown kicks his ass in his imagination. The greatest defeat from the camels of the night was in the foreboding desert of Evil, where they rose up and faced the shining visage of the Elder Gods of Lore, who took the secret Sword of Unspeakable Glory That Vanquishes Fiends and de-flowers maidens whenever the nine planets align perfectly. Now, to get to the Great Sky Palace of Ixictalca in the Lake of Uaxipotl where the Forsaken Soccer Moms of Southern New Jersey gather to feast on cheap wine and the bones of the Damned with hot sauce. "What on Earth are these chipmunks in my groin doing in this weird alien craft", queried Tersahedron, the Chief Examiner of Everything Ever. On routine assignment to the planet of Earth v2.0, noticed an unusual anomaly in the asteroid flying towards his hopelessly outdated ship. It wasn't really that big, but it looked very menacing and he swerved to avoid getting a dent in the chrome. He often drank rich tea with golden sugar cubes